Perfecting being Present

I knew a proposal was coming – I just didn’t know any of the details. Surprising me was always the goal because I am a tough person to surprise. When Bernard asked me, I didn’t say ” Yes,” I just grabbed my beautiful engagement ring and immediately put it on my finger. When we began walking to our destination, Bernard asked, “So is that a Yes?” and all I could do was smile and nod.

It had finally happened.

Nodding yes was the easiest decision I have ever made. It was the simplest part of transitioning from girlfriend to fiancé/bride.

Now the fun of planning a wedding began!

I do not say that sarcastically, I genuinely enjoyed organizing and planning our wedding. I will not lie and say that it was always easy and stress-free. Many times I felt like I was juggling multiple plates unsuccessfully; however, I wouldn’t change a single thing about our wedding day or the experience.

We had a 200 person wedding at the Baltimore Museum of Industry in September of 2015. The easiest parts of our planning were choosing vendors, picking the overall theme and the little details. The most difficult were the guest list, the seating chart, and finding a compromise between Bernard and I’s very different styles of completing tasks.

We didn’t do many traditional things. We didn’t get married in a church; I didn’t wear a veil, we did a first look to make the moment we first saw each other more special and to save time taking pictures. Our reception was in a museum that had a large plane suspended from the ceiling; we did a fast-paced choreographed number for our first dance as opposed to a slow one. It was unique, it was fun, it was quintessentially us.

I previously stated in the Who and What section of the blog that I was labeled by several vendors as the most organized and communicative bride they had ever encountered. I probably asked way more questions than necessary – my husband told me to rein it in when I started asking about the ratio of catering staff to guests. But like many brides, I wanted the day to be perfect.

I think the biggest lesson I learned from planning such an event is that “perfection” is unrealistic. Instead, the best advice I can give to a bride is plan for the unexpected as best you can, still count on the hiccups that will inevitably occur, and be present. One thing is for certain; the day will go by in the blink of an eye – worrying about the imperfections isn’t going to slow down the time it will just distract you from the day itself. The one thing I continuously reminded myself of through all the highs and lows of the planning process is the day would be a victory if by the end of it I am his wife and he is my husband.

Our wedding day was the best day of my 27 years of life – it sounds cliche or like something you are supposed to say, but it is the truth. I look forward to filling this section with more of my planning stories as well as tips and strategies for challenges I hear other bride’s facing and how to manage those conflicts and ensure wedding day success.

If you would like to see some photos from my wedding day, check out our photographer, TPoz Photography’s, blog post here: