Shout Out to All the Baby Daddies

Each night he makes me a cup of tea. The other night he stopped me from doing it, “I’ll make you your tea” he said jumping up from the chair. I looked at him curiously, wondering why the impulse to do this simple task I could easily do myself. But I don’t push it, I appreciate this kindness, and I tell him so – that’s important, that he knows I appreciate all that he does.

Before we got married, I watched my fiancé transform into a husband. Bernard was going on a vacation with his family, which I couldn’t attend because I had to work. The fan in the bedroom was squeaking and rattling, and Bernard quickly replaced it before leaving on his trip. I remember telling him he didn’t have to; I am sure it would be fine while he was gone; but, he insisted because he didn’t want to chance it falling on me while I was sleeping. It was a small and thoughtful act of caring, but it showed the handyman role he was taking on in our home, in our relationship.

Now, I watch as my husband transforms into a father. We discussed electrical outlets two nights ago. I was saying how I needed to buy outlet covers for our son’s room, to which Bernard informed me that the outlets in his room and the rest of the house were a special kind made to prevent babies from electrocuting themselves. He said he got those specifically for that purpose, but if I wanted to get outlet covers by all means. He replaced all the outlets in our house a couple of years ago, was he thinking about our future children then? I had no idea, but it made me smile that it had crossed his mind.

Pregnancy is a woman-centered experience. We are the ones who are going through the physical, emotional, and mental changes day in and day out. We are the ones sharing our bodies and restricting our day-to-day activities to adapt to a new normal. We are the ones who are uncomfortable, frustrated, and hormonal. Although pregnancy is very much woman-centered, the males in our lives are often overlooked, but their importance is no less significant.

So I want to give a shout out to all the men out there with a pregnant significant other. The men who give feet and back rubs without complaint. The men who help their pregnant women put on and tie their shoes or help them up from the couch or bed. The men who sacrifice their sleep space because their significant other needs fifteen pillows to get comfy. The men who deal with freezing houses when their pregnant lady gets hot. The men who make late night food runs or get delivery for weird last night cravings ( although Bernard doesn’t seem to mind my need for Cold Stone, ever.) The men who deal with angry outbursts or uncontrollable sobs for seemingly insignificant things.

While being pregnant is a blessing and at times can be challenging, let’s not overlook the men in our lives. Show him a little appreciation – maybe give him a foot or back rub. Tell him you love him and thank him for everything he has done to make your life a little easier. Recognize that despite growing the child within yourself, becoming parents is something that is happening to both of you.

To my dear husband, Bernard – I love you, I appreciate you, I thank you. You are going to be the best dad.